Adorable contest or MOST ADORABLE CONTEST EVA?!
Ahem. So here is my story that attempts to explain your new Kuni, who is a girl that I have decided to name Lachtna! I'll draw some f'nart latter. I'm sorry if I misrepresent any of your pets. XD Here-a-we-go-sa!
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"Don't say it."
"What?"
"Don't ever pretend.
I know you want to say it."
"I don't even know what you're talking about."
The Kuni turned her back on the Blood Garudor, giving her tail a perfect, impetuous flick. The little bell tied around her fin clinked and swung across the floor.
She put all her effort in to climbing up the specially-placed set of stairs. Why oh why did her kind have to be so
short? Her arms--or feet--or whatever they were--suited her quite well for most purposes. She could hold a bowl and a scoop, reach down into the freezer, operate the machines, and, on good days, mix custom flavors on the chilled marble tabletop. She could even wipe it down afterwards! But
getting to these places, oh--her boss kept a couple different kinds of stepstools and stairs, just for her shorter employees, but it was a hassle.
"Are you just going to ignore me now?" Shoukyaku asked, peering around the cash register. "I can report you for bad customer service, you know!"
"This is difficult!" Lachtna fired back. The laconic Garudor had never really bothered her. Since day one, she'd been able to understand--albeit in a twisted way--the raptor's unique terms of affection.
"Well, hurry it up! I'm parched!"
Mumbling and grumbling and making a lot of noise that sounded grumpier than it was, the Kuni grabbed a handful of cookie bits and tossed them in the icy metal container. She pressed the cup into the unusual metal mixing device, pressed the button, and let the shaking metal rod do the rest.
Claws clacked on tile as Shoukyaku tapped her foot on the tile impatiently.
Rolling her pale blue eyes, Lachtna wrapped a thick cloth around the metal tumbler before picking it up. (Her moist body would become stuck fast if she'd dared to touch it with her bare hands.) She upended the viscous contents into a paper cup bearing the shop's mascot, a scarf-wearing Ursice carrying a blue-melon split in his berry-black paws.
Snapping a translucent lid on the cup, she picked up an extra straw and spoon from a black plastic bin. She brought the whole package back to the countertop. "That'll be 5 Keystones and 32 Keypebbles, please."
The Garudor probed a tiny pouch around her neck with the tip of her beak. She rolled several small stones out of its innards and placed them by the cash register. Unable to leave well enough alone, she snapped her beak and said, "Thanks for the spoon I can't use, by the way."
"Just take your milkshake and go," Lachtna replied in a faux-bitter voice. "You're insufferable."
"And you still haven't told me." Shoukyaku pulled her drink towards her with the tip of one giant wing. "What was I supposed to say to you?"
Lachtna sighed. "Well, every time you come in here, either you or one of Wataame or Recipe or
someone just
has to go and comment on how
ironic it is that
me, a Kuni covered in cow spots of all things, has to go and work in an
ice cream shop..."
"
Shoppe," Shoukyaku said, putting emphasis into the different pronunciation. The way she said it, it sounded like a kind of fancy French desert.
"Don't be pretentious," Lachtna sighed exasperatedly. "Didn't I tell you to go already?" Her tail swished in agitation, tinkling like the "shoppe" door on a busy day.
"I'm waiting for Brush," Shoukyaku said. She swept her drink up towards her mouth and drew a heavy gulp up in her straw. She slurped emphatically.
"Since when do you two hang out?"
"Since I took an interest in Joker Gallizar Romance is when."
"What, you mean those cheap, 4-Keystone paperbacks they sell next to the cheesy self-help books in Ceil-Mart? You
can't be serious."
"...Says the girl with an addiction to comic books."
"Hey!" Riled, the Kuni leaned over the desk. Her mouth was screwed into a scowl. "You don't
even know..."
"And neither do you," Shoukyaku said spryly. Chuckling smugly, she minced over to a table and knelt before it. Her tail was too wide for her to sit down in the chairs--and her legs were not built for it, anyway--but she made herself comfortable while waiting for the Arkuhna.
A happy jingle came from the door as the paint-splotched Kuhna entered. "Hey, Shoukyaku," she greeted cheerfully. "Hey, Lachtna. How's the Rattegan race?"
"Not bad," Lachtna answered. "I don't mind working, you know. Really, I don't."
"Hey, I believe you," Brush said sweetly. Lachtna's nose twitched at the smell of oil that clung to her fur.
"Well, I mean, you know. It wouldn't be very nice of me just to mooch of Moofius all the time," Lachtna tried to explain herself. Shoukyaku tilted her head in a way that suggested she'd heard it all far too many times before. "I've got to support myself, you know? How else am I going to learn responsibility if I don't?"
"Who are you, your mother?" the Garudor teased. "I'm pretty into this free ride thing myself. But whatever, man."
Perfectly changing the topic, without a segue to be had, Brush said, "So, Lacht, did I tell you what I picked up while I was out shopping today? Some cherry-dipped vanilla softserve, please."
"Oh, no, does it HAVE to be the dipped stuff? I always feel like I'm going to fall into the topping vat..."
"
Pllleeeaaaaase?" Brush begged. Her white incisors showed. "You haven't even heard what I found at the supermarket yet! You'll wanna be my best friend
foreverrrr if I tell you?"
"Oh,
what?" Lachtna sighed.
Her tails swishing springily, the Kuhna pounced her paws down on the countertop. "Pagapa! 11 Keystones a round! I got one for you, just for you!"
The Kuni's bell clanged as her tail whipped around. "
Pagapa? Seriously?
Real pagapa?"There was a tangible droplet of saliva clinging to the side of her lips.
"Seriously. One-hundred-percent pure, delicious, runny, mold-encrusted..."Brush's eyes crinkled, and she smacked her tongue around in a way that suggested something on it tasted funny. "Well, I know you like it."
"Brush, you are fantastic!"If there hadn't been a countertop between then, the Kuni would have bowled over the Arkuhna and begun to kiss her face. As it was, she swept the cone of white softserve through the cherry topping with especial zeal. She managed not to fall in.
Pouncing over like a Kuhna herself, Lachtna threw herself up on the countertop and passed Brush her order. The Kuhna never seemed to buy anything else, and she knew the price for a medium cone with cherry topping by heart. She put a passel of Keystones down by the cash register and took her ice cream. "I knew that would make you happy. Just tell me, though. Are you going to eat it, or dissect it?"The Arkuhna gave her a knowing wink.
"Both!"she replied happily. "Real pagapa cheese is too good not to eat. But I'm gonna put it under the microscope, too. Just a little bit. But I want to know what kinds of mold and bacteria they're using in that stuff. I'm gonna reverse-engineer that. Maybe I can ask the Dashalls down the way if they can give me some Gyrophant milk, and..."
"Give it a rest,"Shoukyaku said, cutting through their conversation with one last heavy
slurp. "You don't even have proper cheese-making equipment. As far as lifelong dreams go, you're not very far on your way to fulfilling yours. And on a different note, can we talk about the music they're piping in here? I hate sappy love ballads."
Sticking her chest out defensively, Lachtna replied, "Moopheus said he was gonna buy me some cheesecloths and my own little fridge and stuff for my birthday. And I'm savin' up for some stuff anyway. I'm gonna order some starter cultures online, from CheeseLovers.eve, and then I'll be all set!"
Shoukyaku's laughter was disbelieving, but beneath it there ran a rare current of good, friendly fun. "You have got the
weirdest lifelong dream of anyone I've ever met."
"What's so weird about it?"Brush asked. She bit into her soft serve, cracking the creamy cherry shell. "I love cheese.
Somebody has to make it. Why not a Kuni?"
"I just think it's weird that somebody's lifelong dream would be to make cheese, is all,"Shoukyaku said plainly.
A bell rang. It wasn't Lachtna's. "Oh, wait, hold on, guys,"she said. "End of my shift. I'll be with you after I punch out."
The black-and-white splotched Kuni disappeared into the mysterious gray backroom that all shops seemed to have. Clangs and rustles came as she moved around within it. Shoukyaku and Brush watched the wall expectantly.
Turning in her apron and plastic gloves, Lachtna came out from a white door marked "EMPLOYEES ONLY."A tinkling rhythm filled the air as she walked. She joined Shoukyaku and Brush at their table, her entire body making noise as she hoisted herself into a seat.
Continuing right where they'd left off, Lachtna said, "Making cheese is no walk in the park, you know. You have to know chemistry, biology, gastronomy—it's hard stuff. I mean, you can't make pagapa cheese with Tuskow milk!"A fearful shudder passed through her body at the very sacrilegious thought. "No, no, its fat content is all wrong, and the chemical composition—there's no sucrose at all in it, it's mostly lactose. The signature caramel-like taste of pagapa comes from the bacteria breaking down all that sucrose into simpler sugars, like what happens when you make caramel."
Curiously, Brush cut in and asked, "That stuff tastes like caramel? Really?"
"Pretty much,"Lachtna replied. "It's a little different, but it's still really good. And Gyrophant milk is pretty unique in that it contains sucrose and not glucose, which is a more common sugar. Their bodies can store it from the plants that they eat, see..."
Continuing her musings, and cutting of Lachtna's, Brush rambled, "Really?
Caramel? But it looks so nasty and runny...I mean, can it actually be that good? Seriously?"
"I'll give you some to taste when we get home,"Lachtna said. "I think you'll like it. You want to try some, Shoukyaku?"
"Thanks but no thanks,"she replied. "But I'd rather not put anything it my mouth that's still alive."
"Well, if it means anything,
I think your dream is pretty cool,"Brush complimented her. "It's really unique and creative. And you're really smart. I know you can do it. Did your parents make cheese? Is it some kind of upholding-the-family-tradition thing?"
"Naww, they're lawyers,"Lachtna giggled. "But my uncle's a nutritional anthropologist. For my birthday, he would always take me on a tour of different food production places. Chocolate-makers, bakeries, wineries...one day he took me to a place that made cheese, and that was that. I fell in love. My uncle thinks it's funny, but he's glad I found something I really love."
"That is
so cool,"Brush said. "I guess it's destiny. Didn't you tell me once your name had something to do with milk?"
"It means 'milk-colored,' yeah,"Lachtna said. "But that has more to do with my pattern than anything. Technically, it's a boy's name, but I like it. And when people just call me 'Lacht,' it sounds all German."
"What is it really?"
"Irish."
"And where are your parents from?"
"Lambastia. Pretty normal stuff."
"And what do they think of your chosen profession?"
Tail swirling in laughter, bell ringing, Lachtna replied, "They say—and I hit them for it, every time—that I should have chosen something less cheesy."
Shoukyaku groaned vocally. "That's
horrible. You're horrible. I don't even know why I hang out with you people."
"Because I have ice cream?"Lachtna tried.
Sighing heavily, Shoukyaku admitted, "Yeah, good point."