[Kestrel]

She still comes to me, in my dreams. Coriander, with fur of amethyst and wings dipped in turquoise. She comes to me and stares at me, ruby eyes expressionless. I cry out to her and reach for her…and she leaves. She disappears back into the darkness, into the deep recesses of wherever the multiverse has taken her. I chase after her, running furiously on what I can only assume is solid ground. I never catch up. I will never catch up.

*****

“Mmmm, no, I don’t think that’s right.” Coriander frowned at the clockwork mess in front of her, screwdriver in hand.

“I don’t know, Coriander. No one’s really done anything like this before.”

She glanced back up at him, one corner of her mouth quirking up into a smile. “What, Abvi, you’re saying it’s impossible?”

He grinned back. “I’d never say such a thing. After all we’ve seen? I’m just not sure it’s possible in this world. Maybe we should find a different one.”

She waved him off. “No, no, I can do it. I know it. Besides, I’ve started now. We can’t abandon them halfway through. And anyway, without any hints of what we want, it would take forever to find a suitable one.” She turned back to the pile of metal and gears laid out before her. “I just have to figure out how to get the heart to work, you know? Not easy.”

Abvi smiled indulgently, but she had already started working again. “Of course.”

[12][1]

[Kestrel]

Our daughter walks in my dreams too. Maybe just Coriander’s daughter. She comes in and watches me watch her mother. She never tells me what she thinks. But she’ll sing me back to peace, when Coriander has, as always, vanished from my reach. I’ve only heard her speak once. I don’t know what to make of her, this strange child of mine.

*****

“Abvi, you have to see this!” Coriander rushed over to him, eyes alight and a smile stretching across her face. “I’ve done it! They’re ready!”

She grabbed his arm and pulled him away. Laughing, he stumbled after her, adoration plain on his features. “Of course you have. When did I ever doubt you?”

She stopped at that, hands on her hips. “All the time, Abvi! You kept telling me it wasn’t possible!”

“Not possible? I’d never say that. After all we’ve seen?” He grinned as she rolled her eyes in response.

“Sure, sure. But come look! I’ve finally done it!”

[13][2]

[Kestrel]

The dreams didn’t start right away. For months, there was nothing. But one night, she appeared while I slept. “I’m your daughter,” she whispered to me. “Coriander and Abvi’s daughter.” And then she disappeared, and the dreams began.

*****

She brought him over to what, months ago, had been a messy pile of gears, screws, and loose bits of metal. In its place, was the most stunning image of a yonyuu. The only tells that it was, in fact, clockwork, were the stray scraps of metal showing through its gray fur, and the empty expression in its glass eyes.

“They’re almost ready,” Coriander breathed, eyes shining as she stared at her creation. “A spark of life, and they’re done.”

A chill ran through Abvi’s spine. “What, Coriander, you really mean…to do this? To bring them to life?”

Coriander turned to him, frowning. “Of course. Why else did we spend so many months on this, if not to see it to the end? Did you expect me to leave them standing there, lifeless, motionless, no better than some common metal sculpture?”

She backed up, placing herself ten paces away from the clockwork yonyuu. She threw at glance at Abvi. “I wanted to show you them, in case this fails and I have to rebuild. But you’d better go for this part. I’m not sure how the magic would affect another living being.”

And so he went.

[14][3]

[Kestrel]

She visits my other children, they say. Sometimes, she comforts them. She helps them, and sometimes, I can’t help but wonder…. I have no idea where she came from. And she only appeared after Coriander disappeared. I don’t know who she is.

*****

And when he heard her call his name from inside the room, he rushed back in. Coriander was slumped on the floor, limbs trembling. In front of her…. Abvi’s eyes grew huge. The previously motionless, lifeless clockwork yonyuu was looking at him, and blinking its—their—eyes. It—they—tilted their head at him and took a few steps forward.

“It worked,” Coriander said, her voice weak. She was raising her head just a few inches off the ground, but he could tell it was horribly straining her. She gave him a small smile. “They’re alive.” She turned her head to look at her creation. “Meet Abvi, your father.”

As the yonyuu walked towards him, Abvi couldn’t help but marvel at Coriander’s skill. There was a stiffness to their movements still, but even that was loosening as the yonyuu continued to approach him. If he couldn’t see the patches of clockwork peeking out underneath their coat, if they weren’t looking straight at him with their oddly glassy eyes, if he hadn’t seen Coriander work for months, assembling them out of bits of metal….

Abvi sent the yonyuu—his child, now—a shaky smile. “Hello.”

[15][4][1]

[Kestrel]

I wake up in the mornings, chest tight, shoulders heavy. She’s never there to greet me, and her absence weighs on me. The dreams are a constant reminder: “She’s gone. She’s gone.”

*****

“What do we name her?” Abvi asked, leaning down to look at the tiny bundle nestled against Coriander’s belly.

Her side rose and fell and she panted heavily. “She’s so tiny.” Her voice was quiet, but filled with affection.

“She’s beautiful,” Abvi whispered, touching the tip of his nose to the ball of black fur.

“Evi. She looks like an Evi.”

Abvi smiled. “No doubt you’ll come up with something Evi can be a nickname for in a few days.”

Coriander gave out small laugh. “I have some ideas already.”

“But Evi’s a lovely name. Cute, and yet still lovely. It’ll suit her at any age.”

Coriander smiled down at their newborn daughter. “I love you, my sweet little Evi.”

Under the adoring smiles of both her parents, the newly-christened Evi squirmed, something disturbing the peace of her mind.

[16][5]

[Kestrel]

Some nights I wish for a dreamless sleep, so that I don’t have to face her leaving me, over and over and over again. But some nights I pray for the same dreams again, so that I might see her again. Sometimes, in the day, the image of her in my memory is blurred and slow to come to me. It’s those days that I cling to the knowledge that I’ll see her again, some night. That her image will never fade there.

*****

Abvi awoke with a start.

“She can’t travel without me,” he whispered, eyes widening in horror. “She can’t travel without me! I have to go back. She’s stuck there, I have to rescue her!”

He uncurled himself and sprang up, rushing to an adjoining room. The room was lined with shelves and the floor—except for an empty circle in the middle—was filled with boxes of pale blue, pulsating spheres. Abvi jumped to a section of dark walnut shelves and grabbed one of the many large satchels he found there.

“I’ll need some of these…and some of these,” he muttered to himself, stuffing the satchel with some of the spheres he grabbed out of the labeled boxes. “Not too much more. Maybe some food? Coriander will be hungry, after all this time.”

Immersed as he was in his task of gathering supplies, he didn’t notice someone else enter the room.

“Father.” The voice was sharp. “Father, what are doing?”

[17][1]

[Kestrel]

My children miss her, I think.

*****

Abvi glanced up at the speaker. “I’m going back, of course. I’m going to go rescue her!”

The figure stepped into the room, revealing itself to be a female yonyuu. “Father, stop this.” The yonyuu stepped between him and the box he was reaching for. “You can’t go back. You know you can’t. The Void will suck you in and never let you go.”

When he turned to her, his eyes were wild. “You don’t understand! She’s there, she’s stuck there, and she can’t travel without me! I have to go back!”

“No! No, you can’t. You’ll never find her there. It’s the Void. If she’s anywhere you can reach, it won’t be there, and you know it.”

And he did. Because that was the nature of that world. It sunk its claws in you and did its very best to tear you to shreds. There was a point of no return, in the Void. And he had known that, and she had known that, and they had ventured there anyway.

[18][2]

[Kestrel]

It’s been ten years, in our world.

*****

It was a party, and Abvi was bored. The people around him were laughing and sparkling and doing their very best to appear sophisticated, and interesting, and desirable. The room was the same—clad in the shimmering satin and bedecked with crystal, exuding charm as best as it knew how. But the people, the room, the event, they held no appeal to him. When you had visited other dimensions, seen more wondrous things than could ever be imagined, spoken to creatures you could barely comprehend…the supposed splendors of this world paled in comparison. He ached to leave early, but his agent (for want of a better word) would be furious. And he needed the money his agent could bring him.

“Spot anything interesting?” A soft female voice by his ear brought him out of his musings. He turned to see a lovely yonyuu at his side, a playful grin on her face. “You’re Abvi, right?” she asked.

“Mm, yes. That would be me. And you are?”

“Coriander.”

“Just a first name?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Well, maybe if you were to give me your full name,” she responded, smirking. He could tell that she knew full well that Abvi was not his real name.

She turned to look out over the crowd. “You never answered my question, you know. But I think I can answer it for you.”

Abvi moved closer, to whisper into her ear, “So quick to judge, hm?”

She smirked at him again. “Well, I didn’t say my answer, so who’s to say I wouldn’t have complimented them all? Still, I’m sure nothing can compare when you’re an interdimensional traveler.”

She threw him one last smile and walked off, leaving him stunned. No one, not even his agent, knew the things he sold were from other worlds. He had passed them off as artwork, curios, and magical artifacts, and as far as he knew, everyone accepted that story. So how could this woman, this Coriander, know his secret?

[19][6]

[Kestrel]

Sometimes, when I go traveling, I catch myself pausing at entrances of knowledge, scanning crowds. I find myself venturing further than I otherwise would, seeking out those with answers. I realize I am looking for her. Because I can’t believe that she’s truly gone. I can’t believe that the Void truly left her nowhere. I can’t believe that she was, in the end, destructible.

*****

“Take me with you.”

Abvi looked up at the figure in the doorway. “I can’t, Coriander. We’ve been over this. You can’t dimension jump.”

She moved into the room and planted herself in front of you. “Take me with you, Abvi. It doesn’t matter that I can’t dimension jump. You take food and tools with you all the time. Why can’t you take me?”

Abvi resisted the urge to snarl. He jerked his head towards a glass case on one of his shelves. Inside was a strange, mottled lump of fur.

“Living things don’t take well to the change in form that occurs when I enter a new world. That’s proof right there. I’ve told you this already, Coriander. I’m not risking you having your body horribly twisted and you likely dying on the off chance the stream is kind to you.”

She moved forward, until her determined scowl was inches away from his own annoyed scowl. “And I’m telling you that I know I can handle it. I have stronger magic than you, Abvi. I can weave protection spells.”

“Which only work in our world! Magic isn’t consistent across worlds. What is a protection spell here might be a strangling curse in another world!”

“Then fine! Take me somewhere that has magic consistent with this world! And if my spells feel any strain, we’ll know it’s not safe for me to go anywhere with inconsistent magic.”

She stepped forward and put her head on his shoulder. “I want to go with you, Abvi. I want to share in your adventures.” She nuzzled him. “Please?”

Abvi felt himself softening. There was logic to what she said. And he actually knew of world whose magic was consistent with theirs, but where his form would change. He had taken something akin to a protection spell across to that world in the past, even. And with Coriander pressed so close to him, and her soft voice in his ear….

Abvi sighed, slumping. “Fine. I’ll take you across.”

[20][7]

[Kestrel]

I miss her.

*****

Abvi blinked open his eyes. Another day. Another dream. He stretched, yawning, and sat up in his bed. He glanced to the side at the picture frame on the nightstand. Coriander, human, purple eyes and brown hair, mouth quirked up into a half-smile, half-smirk. She had only ever looked like this a small fraction of the time he had known her, but whatever form she took, whatever shape she was in, he was sure he would always know it was her.

“Good morning, Coriander,” he said softly, a small smile upon his lips.

I miss you.

[21]