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Re: For the Good of...Who? [P, Flame and I, Mature]

Postby MillietheWarrior » 04/14/2013 2:30 AM

Sole had made an effort to reach out to her (not literally, but emotionally) and he couldn’t understand why she wasn’t making the effort to reach back. It wasn’t fair! She knew what she was feeling, but he didn’t. Never in his short life had he been so conflicted. His head was tumbling with emotions and feelings and things he’d never thought or felt or even imagined before. He had nothing to go off of, no experience to draw on to tell him what to do, and it was tearing him apart, driving him insane. It was like waking up from a coma and remembering nothing, not knowing who you were or what you were supposed to do but being expected to pick your old life back up again immediately. Sole knew Astraea didn’t understand what that was like; how could she? She was a normal person with normal memories and normal experiences.

But in basic training, they’d given him a gun, and given him a number. They hadn’t said ‘you might want to prepare for emotions and feelings and all that other fun stuff!’ he’d been taught to shoot and to kill, not to talk about his feelings and figure out what they were! Now the urge to reach out and shake her was back, but Sole kept his hands firmly in his pockets, because he didn’t trust himself to reach for her, didn’t trust her not to run. He could see the flight in her gaze, could see the uncertainty that wasn’t there before. And while it gave him hope, it also scared him, because he didn’t want her to disappear. He couldn’t let her. Without warning, without even his own conscious thought, his hand shot out, clasping around her own, feeling the moisture from the rain slick against her skin and squeezing tightly. His face was ashen, pale as he gazed down at her, willing her not to leave.

The distance still separated them, and he didn’t dare pull her closer, still surprised at his own actions as his fingers gently wrapped around her own. He wished he could just…convey all of his thoughts in a touch. It would be so much easier. But he couldn’t, and the fear he saw in her eyes made his own flutter painfully in his chest, and he took a deep, shaky breath. “How do you know I won’t understand?” he demanded quietly. “How do you know unless you tell me? Help me understand. Let me just try.” Her question caught him off guard, and for a moment, he wasn’t sure how to answer. But in the next second, his gaze hardened and his brows furrowed as the rainwater dripped steadily from the ends of his unruly hair, sliding down his cheeks and tracing the edges of the laugh lines beside his eyes. He hardly felt it, even as the water ran down his neck, soaked his shirt and his clothing, chilling him to the bone. He shivered once, but his gaze never wavered as he spoke, voice low, but confident. “Because I care. Isn’t that reason enough?”

((Sorry it's so short. x3))

I love adventurous tales like that. That uplifting feeling that comes from seeing unknown lands and the knowledge that you came across—nothing can replace it! It opens a path from which self-confidence, experience, and important friendships—from the sharing of life or death situations—are born! But hearing it just isn’t the same. I want to create my own magnificent story!



A great adventure!


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Re: For the Good of...Who? [P, Flame and I, Mature]

Postby Flame » 04/14/2013 4:53 AM

Astraea had seen a lot of things in her time, and there wasn’t much that ever caught her by surprise. However, Sole seemed to be just what the doctor ordered (if a dose of bitter, unwanted medicine was what had been called for), and she found that there were simply too many surprises for comfort when it came to being around him. He turned her very comfortably predictable life upside down, and she found that she didn’t much care for the unknown and unexpected much at all – not after this many decades of being in full control of her own life. However, as tempting as it was to simply run from that which made her uneasy, something forced her to stay, although she was unsure whether that something was on his part or her own.

Of course, she shouldn’t have been surprised to find that he had another tucked up his sleeve for her (despite the fact that he hadn’t known it until then either). It took a moment to register the sudden flash of movement, but the next thing she knew, Sole had her hand in a firm grip, as if he could anchor her there, to him, and keep her from taking off the way she might have wanted to. Clearly he’d read the indecision in her gaze, and Astraea jerked back slightly with shock at the suddenness of it all, but the unyielding force, gentle but steady, of his hand around hers held her in place, and she stopped resisting almost as quickly as she’d started. Her gaze, however, was still uneasy as it flicked back up to his, a hint of something akin to fear flashing through her troubled blue eyes. In the distance, she heard the faint growl that told her Syria was still there and certainly not approving of this new development, but to the Khimera’s chagrin, there was no order given to tear the offending man to shreds. Instead, Astraea simply continued to hold Sole’s eyes with her own, a million different emotions flashing through them at the same time as her mind flickered at the sensation of his large, warm hand gently enfolding hers.

“I…” Her voice tapered off as she sought the appropriate words to suit the situation. “You said that there were many things you’ve yearned for and wanted, but could never have. How could you possibly understand what it’s like to have those things, then have them torn from you?” Her words were vague, hardly providing any more information than she already had to him at this point. In all honesty, she was afraid to open up to him because she hadn’t done so to anyone for longer than she cared to remember. She was afraid of telling him because she never admitted to weakness, not only because it would give him ammunition to use against her in the future, but also because admitting it made it more real than she wanted it to be. His last words forced her gaze away from his once again to study the ground beneath her feet as it steadily grew wetter and wetter in the rain which had begun to fall in greater earnest. He said that he cared for her, but instead of soothing her internal turmoil, it only served to make her fear him more.

“Why would you care about me? I’m the last person in the world that you should care about.” She let out a short, sudden bark of sardonic laughter, almost amused by the sheer ridiculous irony of the situation. “There are so many other people out there who need your ‘care’. What about all those brothers that you so love? Hell, a few days ago, I would have liked you just as much dead as alive, and I would have gladly turned you over to the people with the right money. I’ve done nothing to gain either your trust or your friendship, and yet here you stand, telling me that you want to understand a person you’ve barely just met.” She paused, looking up at him again despite the drops of rain that lightly assailed her face as she did so. Her eyes searched his face, seeking to understand what his motives were at this moment. “Tell me, what would ever make a man like you care about someone like me?”
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Re: For the Good of...Who? [P, Flame and I, Mature]

Postby MillietheWarrior » 04/14/2013 5:18 AM

Yeah, she was right. There were a lot of things Sole didn’t understand and never would. He didn’t have that life experience, because he’d never had a life. He just knew war and the army and daily routines that had no place in the real world. He didn’t know how to handle all of this, and that was what made him frustrated because there had never been a time in his life when he couldn’t handle something. So to suddenly be thrust into that type of situation made him feel as if he was floundering around, groping about in the dark for answers that he couldn’t find. “I know,” he said slowly, his gaze dropping from hers to observe the ground, noting the rivulets of water that ran down the tips of his boots to follow their fellows into the puddles at his feet.

“I don’t really know or understand what that’s like. I probably never will. I’ve never had what I wanted or yearned for, and I’ve never had anything so important to me that it ruined my world when I lost it. But that’s why I’m asking you…to tell me. To help me understand what all of this is. Whatever is…” Making you act so strangely. But who was he to tell her that? She was right again. He hardly knew her, even if he felt like he’d known her for years. Their game of cat and mouse, initially no more than an objective, than a mission, was suddenly something so much greater than he’d ever imagined. It was something that he couldn’t explain, but he knew that if he let her go, he’d never see again, and that was not something he wanted. “I don’t know,” he admitted finally, after a lengthy silence, broken only by the steady pounding of the rain across their shoulders and along the sidewalk, had passed.

“I just don’t know. I love my brothers, don’t get me wrong, but that isn’t what I’m feeling now. It’s a different kind of…love, I think. I-I don’t know. I’ve never done any of this before. I’ve never…felt any of this before. And I know you wanted to kill me; I pretty much wanted the same thing, but that feels like…like it was years ago. No matter how stupid it might be, or how stupid you think I am for saying it,  feel like I’ve known you forever, even if I don’t know your name yet.” He knew her name, but she’d never given it to him outright. He wanted her to do that for him, because where he was from, names meant something; they were who you were as a person. “I want to understand because I just…I do. Because…despite what you are, what you might think of me, or of yourself, or of this whole convoluted mess, I…I know you deserve it. You deserve to have someone care about you. And if that’s all I can give you before you leave, then it’ll be enough for me.” It would never be enough, but if all she wanted was an explanation before she disappeared, then that really was all he could give her.

I love adventurous tales like that. That uplifting feeling that comes from seeing unknown lands and the knowledge that you came across—nothing can replace it! It opens a path from which self-confidence, experience, and important friendships—from the sharing of life or death situations—are born! But hearing it just isn’t the same. I want to create my own magnificent story!



A great adventure!


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Re: For the Good of...Who? [P, Flame and I, Mature]

Postby Flame » 05/20/2013 2:29 AM

Forever.

Such a simple word, and yet so very few grasped the impossible magnitude of it. It was like the word ‘love’ – used so much, yet not enough, and often times erroneously. Words were something that came easily, but actions, not so much. How could this man, who had been given a short and cruelly violent life to live possible understand the meaning of the word? Even Astraea had once thought she’d known its meaning intimately, and yet it wasn’t until her ‘forever’ was over that she truly began to know what it was like as the loss slowly destroyed her, crumbling her foundations from the inside.

She tugged her hand gently, yet firmly out of Sole’s grip, cradling her left hand against her chest in her right. Her skin was slick with the falling rain, but the smooth, reassuring solidness of the gold wedding band pressed against her fingers as she caressed it distractedly, the sensation bringing another pang of grief to mind. The golden, spotted Khimera padded slowly closer, concern for her mistress outweighing her fear of punishment, but Astraea seemed preoccupied with her thoughts. “How could you possibly understand the meaning of ‘forever’?” The murmur was soft, almost to herself, and nearly lost in the quiet hush of the gentle rainfall. Water beading in her dark hair slowly trickled down to drip to the ground, joining the rivulets flowing between the cracks in the road. It felt as if the world was pressing in around her, slowly growing smaller and smaller until she couldn’t breathe anymore. She had to remind herself that she wasn’t alone, and that in this state, she was leaving herself vulnerable to the stranger with whom she was involuntarily sharing this intimately personal moment.

He had never been a cruel person, that person she remembered, and he would never shun a stranger because the goodness in his heart wouldn’t allow it. Something in Sole's voice reminded her of that, the earnestness in his tone so alien and yet at the same time, so familiar, like hearing a song she had thought had been long since forgotten. How was she honoring his memory by so vehemently pushing away this person who wanted nothing but to help her? Or at least, so he said. After all, he had been her quarry but a few days ago, yet now, it seemed like there was nothing more he wanted than to soothe her pain and understand what no one else had bothered to ask about. She glanced up at Sole, her searching gaze holding his for a moment, wishing he was that somebody else, her eyes pleading. “You know nothing of me but that I just tried to take your life a few days ago, and yet here you stand, telling me that you want nothing more than to care for…to love the broken pieces of a puzzle that you don’t understand. Any other person would have simply walked away.” For a moment, her defenses were gone, a hand unconsciously reaching out across the distance between them, her fingertips gently, cautiously brushing against his cheek. “Who are you?”
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Re: For the Good of...Who? [P, Flame and I, Mature]

Postby MillietheWarrior » 05/29/2013 9:53 PM

“I don’t,” he said at last, after the rain had beaded across his skin and dripped down from his nose. It obscured his vision, and he blinked hard to get the water out of his eyes. His gaze, sharp and honed from years of training to be the very best, caught the movement of her hands, caught the glimmer of gold in the dark of the rain, and he finally seemed to understand. Even if he wasn’t all that well versed in human interaction and customs and what they meant, he was well aware of the meaning behind that simple little band around her finger.

“I can’t. I could never understand what ‘forever’ meant, because I don’t have that kind of time. I won’t have a lifetime to figure out what ’forever’ and ’love’ and things like that mean to people like you and I. But I can take a good enough guess right here and now, if that’s acceptable enough for you.”  He seemed oblivious to the approach of the large Khimera, who was pacing closer in concern for her mistress. Sole was oblivious to everything at the moment, to be entirely honest; even the rain that pounded against his jacket, soaking his skin and clothes and chilling him to the bone went unnoticed.

He had eyes only for Astraea, and his brow was furrowed as he gazed at her, as if trying to solve a complex puzzle he’d just been given clearance to see. Tentatively, almost haltingly, he reached out and gently cupped her chin with his fingers, the feel of her skin against his so alien and yet so familiar. A silent memory of that night they’d kissed suddenly warmed his heart and sent it stuttering in a staccato rhythm in it’s cage. “That’s a good question,” he replied with a quiet quirk of his lips. “And I could ask you the same thing. Who are you? What are you afraid of?” he murmured, and he felt himself leaning closer, his forehead scant inches away from his own, her breath fanning across his chin as he gazed into her eyes.

“Are you afraid of getting hurt? I promise I won’t let that happen.” he leaned forward, barely brushing his lips against hers, not daring to press further, willing to give her space and time and whatever she needed. “I promise I’ll be here, whenever you need me. If you can’t tell me who you really are, or tell me why you’re running, then at least let me give you that much. And at least…give me your name.”

(-Dies inside- So...short...)

I love adventurous tales like that. That uplifting feeling that comes from seeing unknown lands and the knowledge that you came across—nothing can replace it! It opens a path from which self-confidence, experience, and important friendships—from the sharing of life or death situations—are born! But hearing it just isn’t the same. I want to create my own magnificent story!



A great adventure!


+Imp. Documents+ +Menagerie+ +Wishlist+ +Journal+
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Re: For the Good of...Who? [P, Flame and I, Mature]

Postby Flame » 05/30/2013 4:36 PM

He said that he didn't have forever...but wasn't that the truth of the matter for everyone? Nobody truly had forever, even Astraea, with her inhuman regenerative abilities and potential for immortality. Eventually, her life would one day come to an end; it was only inevitable, whether or not it was by her choice. The day when she'd lost 'forever' was the day that she'd come to terms with that fact, and she knew that when the time came, she had nothing to fear from death. If anything, she would embrace it as a dear friend, because maybe, just maybe, she would be reunited with her love in death as they could not be in life. Perhaps it would have been easier had she sought it out actively herself, but at the same time, she didn't believe in the pointless waste of life. If she could have given it away to another, she would have, perhaps someone in the same situation as herself.

Everything about this situation felt so wrong; the words he was saying, the familiarity of his touch...but she had been alone for so long, and everything about what was happening here and now was awakening old memories and triggering reflexive instincts she thought had been long buried. She was lost, and had no idea or guidance as to what she was supposed to do here, but Sole seemed so confident in comparison despite his lack of experience, and her body simply followed where he led. His fingers on her chin lifted her head gently, her eyes falling on his face, their sapphire depths troubled with worries which he could not begin to understand. It wasn't him that she was afraid of, per se. Even she didn't really know what it was that was the cause of her unease right now.

"It isn't the pain that I fear," she finally replied, her words slow, almost ponderous. "When you've suffered enough loss, the pain simply becomes a sideproduct." She seemed suddenly stern, her expression almost condescending as she eyed Sole. "How could you promise that someone will never get hurt? You are promising the impossible. Trust me, I would know. I've known someone like you once in my life, and I won't make that same mistake twice." However, when he leaned in, his lips touching hers briefly, she seemed to waver for a moment, not quite pushing him away. This entire situation was an emotional overload for her, and yet at the same time, she was tired of pushing people away. There seemed to be an internal struggle raging in her eyes as she fought between fleeing and standing her ground, but she didn't take off quite yet. "...Astraea." The word was simple, but it was more than she'd given him yet. Her name wasn't something she often shared, but it was the least she could do for all this man had tried to do to help her.
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