by Rainbowfox Ari » 01/22/2008 1:27 AM
While Aaron's BODY slept, his mind was active, seeking out, and touching the minds of every single one of his children - including the injured and pregnant Atros, and the ill Cody in other parts of the city. It reverberated through their entire beings, bringing with it a different emotion for each. For Atros, Adze, and Intre, there was the feeling of sorrow. Of remorse. Of apology. And of tears. Indeed, Aaron's physical eyes leaked tears as he spoke to them, and only them, through telepathy.
~ My children... I am so sorry. I have not been where I belonged, and for that, I don't blame you if you hate me. I never got to fully meet you, let alone understand you, and I understand how much you may want to murder me at this moment. I don't blame you if one of you draws a gun and shoots me. ~
The next bits of mental dialog were only audible to those they were addressed to.
~ Intrepidus... I'm sorry for what I've done to you, not being here. I wanted to protect you from the world, to shelter you and watch you grow into a fine young woman... it seems as though you have done this with me, though. Which makes me very sad. I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive this stupid man his faults. ~
~ Adze... How could you ever forgive me? I never even got to see you before I left, as the nurse only showed me one of my children before the military called me back. I know how badly you must hate me for being absent, and I.... I know it can't change things, but I'm so very, very sorry. If you ever forgive me... I know that would make me very happy. But don't do so out of any feeling of duty. To see you sad makes ME sad. ~
~ Atros... My poor, poor deranged son. I wish you could have been here to see me home, but I heard of your misfortune, and I swear I will find that boy and make him pay, if Strages hasn't already. I love you. Sleep well, and I'll come see you later. ~
And now, his tone changed, as he was talking to Liam and his sister and brother.
~ Liam... ahh, my Liam. I have heard much about you from Strages' letters. I hear you are experimenting with magic. Just know that ANY time you need any assistance, I'm here for you. I may not have been here previously, but I'm here now. I wish I could have been there to help you start to learn, but.... Oh Liam... can you ever forgive me, my son? ~
~ Nardat... I was looking forward to meeting you, but it appears that fond tidings may have to wait. From what I've heard from Strages, you have become a beautiful, intelligent, and talented woman that I am proud to call my daughter. I know I have not been where I needed to be, but I am so very proud of you all the same. Do you think you can find it in you to forgive me for my absence, sweetheart? ~
~ Rein... I don't know where you are, and I had hoped to meet you here. There is something about you that intrigues me. If there was one thing I'd like to ask you right now, it would be to tell me where you are. Not in physical location, but in life. I want to know what interests you, so I can learn about it, and have something worthwhile to discuss when we finally meet face to face. Forgive me? Please? ~
He didn't address any of his grandsons but Vivax, as he knew Cody probably needed his sleep, and the other one was most likely too protective to stop and chat. According to Zaak's letters, anyway.
~ Vivax... I can't say for certain how you feel about me. As a grandfather, I believe I am an epic failure. As a father, even moreso. But I wish I had been there at your birth, and been there to spoil you when I had the chance. Unfortunately, life doesn't quite work that way, and there are things we can't change. Can you forgive your grandpa for not being there when you needed him? ~
And now, he was back to the general assembly.
~ I love you all, very, very much. And I hope you have it in your hearts to love me, and to forgive me. However, if you do not, I can understand. My father was absent for much of my life, and I know what it's like. I wish I had never had to do this to you all... ~
With that, more tears trickled from his closed eyes, and he stifled a sob, still sleeping.