[SpringsSong]

"Koth... I wish my reasoning was as good as yours, Lana," Xyshari continued.  "Koth I killed purely out of anger, and because I did not like him.  He ran off when I let Kaliyo take those droids offline, and then he came back to steal the Gravestone--doubtless when he heard that I let Arcann go," she said.  "At that point it felt like he was impeding the Alliance's progress, not helping it."

"I see," Lana said.  "Now I understand why you were so... upset afterward."

[SpringsSong]

"I'd slipped and given into my inner darkness," Xyshari said plainly.  "I took a life needlessly, and it... affected me," she said, hanging her head.  "Even though he did more harm than good to the Alliance."

"You can't keep beating yourself up over it, my love," Lana said gently.  "It happened, yes, but now it is in the past.  You've learned from that incident, and now... well, now we're free of all of those obligations.  You are the Alliance Commander only as a formality now."

"Yes, and I was the Barsen'thor, the Battlemaster, and a member of the Council," Xyshari said, sighing.

[SpringsSong]

"So many titles--and not necessarily asked for," Lana said, and Xyshari nodded.

"I told them with each title that I was not sure that I was ready for such responsibility," she said.  "However, they said that that meant that I was--because I was hesitant to accept that power," she said, shaking her head as she offered a low growl.  "I didn't want the power that came along with being a Master of the Order, much less its Warden."

[SpringsSong]

"What even went along with that title?" Lana asked, and Xyshari sighed as she shrugged slightly.

"I earned it by curing several masters of a plague that originated within the Dark Side of the Force, on Malachor Three," Xyshari said.  "Terrak Morrhage was the person who created it.  Does that name mean anything to you?" she asked.

"The plaguemaster?  Of course," Lana said.  "All aspiring Sith alchemists learn of his work.  I was not one of those aspiring alchemists."

[SpringsSong]

"I never figured you for an alchemist in the first place," Xyshari said.  Lana offered a shrug.

"The crystal in my saber now is the first crystal I've ever held from Ilum," Lana said.  "All of my other crystals were made through Sith alchemy.  That's the only way you can make red crystals, aside from... bleeding them."

"I've heard of the process.  It's painful for the Jedi who was bonded to the crystal previously," Xyshari said.  "...assuming they survive the process."

[SpringsSong]

"That's right," Lana said.  "I never bled a crystal.  It felt too... barbaric a process to go through.  Besides, Marr revealed to me once that, if I ever needed another crystal for my saber, some of those... higher in the Dark Council was going to expect me to capture you and bleed one of your crystals, to show that you hadn't had any effect on me after Yavin."

"I'd have two options, then," Xyshari said.  "Sever my bond with the crystal--and you--or die as my crystal was bled."

[Wild Pet Found]

[SpringsSong]

"Could it really be that severe?" Lana asked.

"Yes," Xyshari said, nodding her head.  "When we find our crystal, we form a bond with it--similar to the one that we've formed, but stronger.  The crystal is the heart of the blade; the heart is the crystal of the Jedi; the Jedi is the crystal of the Force; the Force is the blade of the heart; we are one," she said.  "This is the code I recited when I came to the cave; the code my master passed onto me."

[SpringsSong]

"We have nothing so elegant for our sabers," Lana said.  "Most of ours are synthetically created, so when you took me to Ilum... it was strange."

"I can imagine," Xyshari said.  "I never talked to you about that trip beyond briefly touching on your vision's similarity to my own, did I?" she asked, and Lana shook her head.

"We never spoke of it," Lana said.  "I imagine that it was... still a special trip for you, despite it not being your first time," she said.

[SpringsSong]

"But what of your thoughts of the trip?" Xyshari asked.  Lana thought for several long minutes.

"I was surprised that the Empire seemed intent on gunning us down," Lana said.  "Was it like that when you got your crystal?"

"Yes," Xyshari said.  "And then, we had to fight our way through the blizzard to get to the camp to get to the caves," she said.

"The caves were... beautiful," Lana said.  "Such a powerful nexus in the Force.  So many Sith would love to corrupt that place."

[SpringsSong]

"You understand, now, why I was so hesitant to bring you along even though I knew you needed to come," Xyshari said.  "That is our one natural source of Kyber crystals.  We cannot make our own crystals.  If we were to lose that spot on Ilum... we'd lose our ability to make sabers; at least, for now," she said, lowering her head.

"I do appreciate you trusting me with such an important thing," Lana said, kissing Xyshari's cheek, although she lingered there for a moment, brushing her lips against Xyshari's fur.

[SpringsSong]

Xyshari purred softly as her lover's lips lingered on her cheek.  Her eyes slid mostly closed as she gave a small sigh, and then, she placed a gentle hand on Lana's face.

"I trust you with everything, Lana," she said softly.  "I would have hardly proposed to you if I thought you would stab me in the back for your own gain.  You... you proved yourself many times over.  Trusting me on Rishi, trusting me on Yavin, and then again on Ziost..."

[SpringsSong]

"And then searching for you for five years after you and Darth Marr disappeared into Wild Space," Lana finished.  "And helping build the Alliance..."

"The Alliance wouldn't be what it became without you, Lana," Xyshari said.  "Even if Theron stabbed us in the back, and then actually didn't," she grumbled, looking around warily.  Lana frowned.

"You don't suspect that he's following us, do you?" Lana asked, and Xyshari shrugged.

"You know Theron about as well as I," she said.  "Do you suspect?"

[SpringsSong]

"Knowing that he had feelings for you once upon a time, I would not be surprised if he were keeping an eye on you to be sure that you were safe," Lana said.  "And I don't think he ever fully forgave me for letting him get captured on Rishi, so he would be wary of me even five years later."

"Even after we saved his ass on Nathema from the Order of Zildrog," Xyshari said, shaking her head with a chuckle.  "He really never changes, does he?"

[SpringsSong]

"Once SIS, always SIS," Lana mused.  "I suppose he also knows how badly he damaged our trust when he betrayed us, so he knows that we're likely to not trust him for a very long time, either," she said.  Xyshari nodded.

"Well... if it had been you, I'd have been heartbroken," Xyshari said.  "There was such... hatred in his voice when he spoke about why he was doing what he was doing, Lana.  Perhaps because I was close to him, although not like I was with you... but it stung."

[SpringsSong]

"I remember hearing what he said, but it was like I was hearing it through your ears," Lana said.  "I also remember feeling... what you were feeling.  Betrayal, heartbreak, anger, confusion,' she said.  Xyshari nodded.

"An effect of the Force bond we formed," Xyshari said.  "We can feel what the other is feeling more often than not, and I suppose if one of us is incapacitated, they can still feel and hear what is happening through the other."